Gujju wrote this
English Love Letter :
Maari Deer Pusspa Ben,
U r que tea, luv lee, no tea, on nest, attract thief, cheer fool, soup pub & u r very pre tea
Come less bhai...
Terrible English by PT sir: 😁😁
1) There is no wind in the football.. 😆
2) I talk, he talk, why you middle talk?. 😝
3) You rotate the ground 4 times.. 😳
4) You go and understand the tree. 😳😳
5) I'll give you clap on ur cheeks.. 😓
6) Bring your parents and your mother and especially your father. 😓😓
7) Close the window airforce is coming. 😂
8) I have two daughters and both are girls.. 😂😭
9) Stand in a straight circle.. 😆
10) Don't stand in front of my back 😱😭😭
11) Why Haircut not cut..? 😵😵
12) Don't make noise.. principle is rotating in the corridor 😂😂😂
13) Why are you looking at the monkey outside the window when I’m here? 😅
14) You talking bad habit 😁
15) Give me a red pen of any colour. 😖😓
16) Can i have some snow in my cold drink? 😭😭
17) Pick the paper and fall into the dustbin. 😜
18) Both of u stand together separately. 😝😝
19) Keep quiet the principal just passed away!! 😂😂😂😂😂....
Dont laugh alone pass it....👍👍👍👌👌😜😜
HIn a Bangkok Temple:
IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN.
Cocktail Lounge, Norway:
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.
Doctor's Office, Rome:
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.
Dry Cleaners, Bangkok:
DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.
A Nairobi Restaurant:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE, OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.
On the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi:
TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.
On a poster at Kencom:
ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP.
In a City restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.
In a Cemetery:
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS, FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.
Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE, OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS, IN BED.
On the menu of a Swiss Restaurant:
OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.
In a Tokyo Bar:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.
THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE, IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.
In the lobby of a Moscow Hotel, across from a Russian Orthodox Monastery:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY, WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY, EXCEPT THURSDAY.
A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE, THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT, UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.
Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.
A Laundry in Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND THEN SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.
And finally, the all time classic, Seen in an Abu Dhabi Souk shop window:
IF THE FRONT IS CLOSED, PLEASE ENTER THROUGH MY BACKSIDE.
Hilarious Apology Letter.....
A School Master from a remote rural area in Bihar was transferred to a new School in Mumbai. He reported for duty two days after the actual date of joining. Consequently he was asked for an explanation in writing...
If small small mistakes getting inside my letter, I big you pardon, ass I am not a good englis speaker.
This is my fist vijit to Bombai. Stickly speaking, I wanted to joint your school more fastly, but for the following region, too much time lost in getting slipper reservation in three-tyre compartment. I tolded I has head ache problem due to migration. Still the clerk rejected to give ticket to I and my sun.I putted a complain on station masterji. He said I to go to the lady clerk. At first she also rejected. I then pressed her for long time and finally with great difficulty she gave a birth to my son.
Anyway I thanked the station master also because he was phully responsible for getting birth of my son.
Ass a hole it was a bhery diphicult experiment in my hole life. I hope u will look into explain my hole story I am now ending this fastly.
I am a waiter for your responsement. May god blast you.
What ?? Alcohol ban in my Kerala ! This is zimbly terrible. Today I will take an otto, go to the temble and ask God why he did thiz in hiz own kentry?? I ask all my ungles and aunthies to take all their meney and shift to Gelf and Thhubai immediately !
Enough of Sardar jokes……Mallu jokes are in town!!!!!!!!!!
1) What is the tax on a Mallu's income called?
2) Where did the Malayali study?
In the ko-liage.
3) Why did the Malayali not go to ko-liage today?
He is very bissi.
4) Why did the Malayali buy an air-ticket?
To go to Thuubai, zimbly to meet his ungle in Gelff.
5) Why do Malayalis go to the Gelff?
To yearn meney.
6) What did the Malayali do when the plane caught fire?
He zimbly jembd out of the vindow.
7) How does a Malayali spell moon?
MOON - Yem Woh yet another Woh and Yen.
8) What is Malayali management graduate called?
Yem Bee Yae.
9) What does a Malayali do when he goes to America ?
He changes his name from Karunakaran to Kevin Curren.
10) What does a Malayali use to commute to office everyday?
11) Where does he pray?
In a Temble, Charch and a Maask.
12) Who is Bruce Lee's best friend?
A Malaya-Lee of coarse.
13) Name the only part of the werld, where Malayalis dont werk hard?
14) Why is industrial productivity so low in Kerala?
Because 86% of the shift time is spent on lifting, folding and re-tying the lungi.
15) Why did Saddam Hussain attack Kuwait?
He had a Mallu baby-sitter, who always used to say 'KEEP QUWAIT' 'KEEP QUWAIT'.
16) What is the Latest Malayali Punch Line?
Frem Tea Shops To Koll Cenders , We Are Yevery Where ".
17) Why aren't Mallus included in hockey and football teams?
Coz Whenever they get a corner, they set up a tea shop.
Now pass it on to 5 Mallus to get a free sample of kokanet oil.
Pass it on 10 Mallus to get a free pack of Benana Chibbs....